Tag Archives: worry

Worry not

If I’ve pulled one valuable lesson from meditation, introspection, and light dabbling in eastern religions, it’s that worrying is probably the most wasteful action we, as humans, succumb to. It’s so easy, from the outside, to dissect another person’s problem and tell them not to worry about something. But when faced with a problem of our own, this advice somehow gets drowned in a sea of worry, and we cannot face the situation with effectiveness.

There are two types of situations in life; situations that we can control, and situations that are beyond our control. Think of the last time you were worried, and return to the cause of that worry. Perhaps you worried about turning in an assignment (at work, or school) by a certain deadline. The deadline was probably set in stone, a deadline which you had no control over. And everything regarding the project should be within your control. It is paramount to take responsibility for your actions, and do everything in your power to produce a solid product within the alloted amount of time. Any brainpower, effort, or time devoted to worrying is less brainpower, effort, and time that can be devoted towards the task at hand. Don’t worry about a paper you need to work on; just work on the paper. Worrying nets you absolutely nothing, and is counterproductive to reaching your goal.

Some situations are way outside the realm of control. Have you worried about a driver crashing into you? You can focus your efforts on driving defensively and maintaining awareness, but any worry you put into getting hit will ultimately have a derogatory effect on driving. Worried you might get cancer? You can take preventative measures through diet, exercise, and minimizing exposures to carcinogens, but in the end, worrying about the prospect does nothing for you. In fact, the stress induced by worrying can have a negative effect on your body. Totally counterproductive.

When flying from Sydney to JFK, I encountered the worst turbulence of my life. It wasn’t a small bump, but more like a roller coaster. First-class cocktails were soiling the suits of businessmen, and the bottled water was spilling on the rest of the plebs and me in coach. Infants and grandmothers were screaming. I was having fun with it at first, rationalizing the safety of air travel versus driving. And then, after it continued for upwards of a minute, I asked myself “At what point should I stop smiling and embracing the ride, and start to worry if this situation is serious?” It was then that the epiphany struck me. Needless to say, the plane made it through; I’m alive and well. But even in the event of a crash, at no point in the descent would it have made sense to worry. The situation was totally out of my control, and rested in the hands of the pilots. I can either wash my hands clean of the situation, aid in the situation (had I something of value like piloting skills to contribute), or worried about it.

If you extract yourself from a situation, look at it logically and unemotionally, it should become clear that you can either positively affect it through conscious action, or just go with the flow because there is nothing you can do about it.

Comment with something you’ve worried about, and then realized that it really wasn’t worth worrying about.

I’ll leave you with some insight from the wise men of our times.

Eckhart Tolle: “Worry pretends to be necessary but serves no useful purpose.”

Axl Rose: “I don’t worry ’bout nothin’, no, because worryin’s a waste of my time.” [Mr. Brownstone]

To all those who never saw it coming…

car“In the August incident near San Diego, the fiery crash of a 2009 Lexus ES 350 killed California Highway Patrol Officer Mark Saylor, 45, and three others on State Route 125 in Santee. The runaway car was traveling at more than 120 mph when it hit a sport utility vehicle, launched off an embankment, rolled several times and burst into flames. One of the family members called police about a minute before the crash to report the vehicle had no brakes and the accelerator was stuck. The call ended with someone telling people in the car to hold on and pray, followed by a woman’s scream.”
Excepted from Yahoo! News

A handful of lives lost because the gas pedal on a car was stuck down. Sometimes people go out for a drive and don’t come home.

Freight falls out of airplanes onto peoples houses. Scaffolding collapses in cities. Stray bullets hit passerbys, and sometimes, cartels just get the wrong guy. The most dangerous part of flying is the drive to the airport. Unexplained aneurysms strike randomly and kill instantly.

Who could forget those awful Volkswagen commercials where the driver and passenger would be having a grand old time, cajoling one another up front, and then they get T-boned. Thanks to these ads, for a period of time, I was afraid to legitimately enjoy myself while driving.

So what’s the message here? Certainly not to live in fear and give up driving. But simply to realize that human life is fragile, and demise can find you without warning. It’s an excuse to live a little more foolhardily. Bite off more than you can chew. Would you rather sing your swan song trying to escape an avalanche skiing out of bounds, or slip down a flight of stairs in your ski boots and meeting your end at the bottom? Should your last minutes be embraced while skydiving or while crossing the street? It can hit you at anytime.

We often overassess risks because the human/egoic instinct is to survive. Prolong your time on Earth, reproduce, spread your seed. However, the younger you are, the more risks you should be taking. Especially for those under 30, now is the time to take risks and make mistakes. Your body is more resilient and can bounce back from injury. It is the time to make riskier investments, both in yourself and financial markets. Better off losing a big chunk of your retirement savings now then 30 years down the line. Without a family to support and a mortgage payment to meet (kudos if you already own a home), you have a little more leeway to screw up. Mistakes force us to learn, and with big risks come great rewards. If you bet right, the spoils can be immense. Negative outcomes of risks we take aren’t as catastrophic as we think; we always prepare for the worst. And so many actual risks to our lives are outside of our control, worrying about them offers us nothing.

In short, make the most of today, everyday, because you might not be here tomorrow.